i justrealsied when u are drawing sometihng or writing or doing whatever which involves putting pen to paper...its very important what pen u use.....like if i use a ballpoint pen i wld be confident in drawing some stuff like a straight line then if i was using the finer ink pen....cosi wld be able to put more pressure on and controll the pen and not worry that the paper wld break and it wld feel safer...and michelle is sprouting nonnsese....and i just realised why im like this...cos i dont have anyone to talk to...........like u know have a decent conversation where i dont have to worry about it going out to others or like not worrying oh am i allowed to say this or sld i tell them this cos they are better off not knowing or rather can't know abt it or if i tell them this what wld happen to the person who is involved...........ie i seriously need to talk to a friend....a frined who isnt exactly downwards or upwards but horizontal on the same level....and right now......they arent around me...they are elsewhere....elsewhere far far away.............

need sleep....

sig so much work to do...and i realised im very anal about certain stuff.....like i cannot halfway jump in and do...i need to do form the begaining.....if not i wld get very stressed about the front part...and like oh no oh no....what if i do this then idecied to do it antoer way later or there are so many different ways to do ti and i cat seem tofind the best way...ie theway i wld be least stressed....it doesnt eed to be the most efficient way......lalalallal.a.....sleep sleep.........zzzzzzzzz